Friday, October 30

run, to stop

sometimes my feelings to towards my children are as bipolar as they are. its amazing how quickly you can go from a sparkling smile to a frustrated furrowed brow. from one minute laughing and playing to scolding and handing out time outs like candy on halloween.
as i put the clean couch cushion back on and clean sheets on my bed (both 5 am throw up victims) i listened to wooden blocks being thrown around the girls room. then i look in the bathroom sink and there is a wad of chewed up cranberries attempting to go down the drain. a bit earlier there was a huge chunk of ivy's hair that was lying on the kitchen floor- payback for pinching velzy while trying to steal her hard boiled egg. oh, and don't look but parts of that very egg are on the kitchen floor needing to be swept up and those strawberry remnants on the table need some attention. but that will have to wait a minute because someone needs their butt wiped and someone else needs a drink of water- right now... you get my point.
i needed to feel something other than frustration towards my little angels today, in the worst way. then i remembered that we live by this:

i packed up a little lunch, while listening to "ivy is pinching my nipple!" "get cheese-its!" "lets go!" and "i ate a bugger."

we parked and walked to Heavenly Fathers house. the girls ran to stop and smell the roses. there has got to be something more to that. run, to stop and smell the roses. and then i realize that smelling the roses is what is important. it doesn't matter if my sheets have to wait till tonight to be put back on the bed and it's alright if i can't do everything I want to do. what i need to do is run, to stop and smell the roses. enjoy the little things and brush off the annoyances. sometimes that is so hard to do though.
as we sit and eat our leftover pasta salad, cheese-its and juice boxes my mood shifts. it's going to be all right.
the girls walk around some little paths, probably not are reverent as some might like, but they are happy and getting along well and i am sitting soaking in some much needed sunshine.
later as we are walking around ivy asks me "can we go inside the temple?"
"no, not today, sorry."
"because jesus is sleeping in there?"

the smile is back on my face, i hope i can remember to keep it there for a while.

15 comments:

Keli'i and Megan said...

Love, love, love this post. And boy, do I relate.

Stephanie J. Robertson said...

Ditto Megan- my heart just feels glad after reading this. Glad for you, glad for your girls, for the chance we get to start over while they are so young and forgiving and that we get to have the spirit with us too.

Sallyseashell said...

Yes! Loved this post. I can relate, as well. You are a very talented writer by the way. You always make me laugh.

chanel said...

i hope you seriously know what an amazing mother you are! my goodness. what a great reminder of what is most important.

echo said...

thanks for posting this. i loved reading it.

echo said...
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Melissa said...

yeah i liked this too, thanks for sharing your thoughts. that sounds lame but i always learn a lot when people share what they are thinking, it helps me grow too.

The Deter's and Peach's together. said...

excellent post. i am nervous to embark on the life of having two kiddies. you are doing a great job!!!

Katie said...

Thanks Ashley for this... There are so many days that I feel the same way and from the look of the other comments, I guess I'm not the only one. So good to know. But I like that we can just slow down and enjoy our little kiddies. Thanks!

Matti said...

I'm glad to know I am not the only one....bipolar. That is the perfect way to describe it! Haha, and I was definately bipolar yesterday too. I'm glad you were able to get the smile back on your face. I was too. ;-)

liko said...

i totally loved this post, ashley. and this is exactly how my life is, too.

going to the temple is always nice.

Erika said...

Cute post...really cute post. I loved it. To me it seems like you're pretty good at running to smell the roses. That's something I'm constantly trying to work on.

The Trotter Family said...

Thanks for the reminder. I think we forget sometimes!

stef j. said...

amen.

thanks for the reminder. :)

Brooke and Aaron said...

This is exactly what I needed to hear. Tomorrow I'm going to run, to stop too..because that is what is most important. Gosh it's so hard to be patient sometimes but our angels deserve it.